By Jill Boman

In parts one and two I wrote about God’s faithfulness in bringing us through trials as well as the value the of the trials themselves—process is not only inevitable, it is good. This brings me to a little qualifier. Being in a difficult process can be a catalyst for growth and discovery in our lives, but we need to be wise enough not to take every thought and feeling we experience in the course of it too seriously.

There is a “hyper sensitivity” that can develop while we are in pain that has both a good and a bad side. The good part is that the challenge to our faith and security forces us to pursue God more seriously if we are going to spiritually survive. It presents an opportunity to develop character, fortitude, endurance, dependence on God and knowledge of the Word in the same way a plant’s roots grow deeper in times of drought. We can also become open to make necessary changes in our life, especially if the pain is a result of our own behavior or decisions! On the down side, I have noticed a vulnerability to depression, pessimism, and low self-esteem that seems to accompany the emotional exhaustion of walking adversity’s steep and bumpy road.

One day my husband and I were discussing the challenge we were facing together at the time. Speaking in faith, David offered, “It’s going to be so cool to see how God uses this later to minister through you.” I was so not there then! I spoke honestly about my feelings when I answered, “I don’t want God to use this! I don’t even want to remember this whole experience.” Funny how in the years following that season I discovered a type of “radar” within my being that makes me recognize suffering in other people, especially women. Despite my earlier desire to have absolutely nothing to do with this sort of thing, I find myself compelled to talk with and encourage those who are seriously hurting—and here I am writing about it! And to think, my negative declaration years before felt so true at the time.

Just the other day my sister and I were talking on the phone about the postpartum depression she suffered from after her daughter was born. She told me that while she was suffering she would become angry when people tried to encourage her, repeating the cliché: “There is light at the end of the tunnel.” She said, “You know, when you’re in the middle of it, there is no light. It’s impossible to see it.”

The book of Job provides a great illustration of this phenomenon. Job was pushed to the very limits of his capacity to endure suffering. In a moment of weakness and frustration with God he declared (12:14), “Behold He tears down and it cannot be rebuilt.” Further venting his despair (19:7, 10), “I cry violence! But I get no answer; I shout for help, but there is no justice…He breaks me down on every side…” It is a picture of gut-wrenching pain and hopelessness. Job was speaking from the depths of his being what seemed true, but he was wrong. Those emotion-charged words were boldly spoken in error. We know the end of the story, but at the time Job did not. Afterwards, Job was restored—twofold (42:10). In Job 42:12 we see that “the Lord blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning.” Even though Job would not have believed it earlier, in the end he admitted (42:3), “I have declared that which I did not understand.”

Being in the midst of a long and painful ordeal can make a person feel not only unfixable like Job did, but also ugly and unlovable. I know several people who have battled with a “nerd complex” as a result of their suffering. Years ago I was reading about the building of Solomon’s temple in 1 Kings when I stumbled upon what could have been passed off merely as interesting trivia. In description of the construction process, I read in 1 Kings 6:7 that “there was neither ax nor any iron tool heard in the house while it was being built.” That struck me as peculiar. Why wouldn’t there be loud sounds at a construction sight? After a few days of contemplating, the answer hit me: because it was holy. The temple was unfinished, unpolished, maybe even a little messy, but because of its association with the presence of God, it was holy.

This becomes more significant when you consider what the New Testament says about the temple of God. We read about the present temple in 1 Corinthians 3:16: “Do you not know that you are a temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?” If you believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, you have the Spirit of God dwelling within you, and therefore you are God’s temple (John 7:38, 39). Keeping that in mind, look at what God had to say about His temple back in 1 Kings 9:3: “I have consecrated this house which you have built by putting my name there forever, and my eyes and my heart will be there perpetually.” Go ahead and insert your name in place of the words “this house which you have built” in that verse and read it again. This is God’s heart towards you and I who believe—His temple. We may be unfinished, unpolished, maybe even a little messy, but He has chosen us to inhabit by His Spirit. This makes us holy—even if we do feel a bit nerdy sometimes!

Refuting the destructive thoughts and feelings that usually accompany trials is a battle! Fortunately we have the best possible weapon for the task. Ephesians 6:17 says the Word of God is the “sword of the Spirit.” And Hebrews 4:12 elaborates a little more, calling it “living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword.” Imagine the sharp tip of a sword bursting bubbles. We use the term “bursting bubbles” to describe breaking through wrong or delusional thinking. We might say something like: “Sorry to burst your bubble, but it’s going to rain today.” The Word of God does the same thing for us.

Remember Gideon hiding out in the winepress from the Midianites? He was beating out wheat in order to salvage it from the looting he anticipated. An angel appeared to him and in an ironic, almost comic declaration, announced (Judges 6:12), “The Lord is with you, O valiant warrior.” Valiant warrior? That is not my impression of the scene and it sure doesn’t look like it was Gideon’s either! But look at what happened next. Gideon led Israel in a heroic, miraculous victory against Midian! What the angel spoke to Gideon was the truth, even though Gideon was not walking it out before.

King David is another example. Samuel anointed him as king while he was still known as a little brother and a shepherd boy (1 Samuel 16). Afterward his life changed dramatically: he was brought into Saul’s court, killed Goliath, then after a period of conflict with Saul, he became the new king. In both cases, the Word of God, the sword of the Spirit, burst bubbles—the underestimated lives Gideon and David were living at the time—and released them into their destinies.

Jesus, who is our ultimate role model, relied on the Word of God as an anchor to reality when Satan tempted Him. It is interesting that the temptation occurred after a long period of fasting: we seem to be more vulnerable during times of exhaustion and physical weakness. He had become hungry (Matthew 4:2) when Satan came to Him with suggestions that would ultimately have thwarted God’s purposes had Jesus given in. Satan tempted Him to pursue physical comfort, power, and glory in wrongful ways. With each temptation Jesus accomplished His resistance, beginning with the words: “It is written.” He quoted Scripture! He chose to rely on the truth of God’s Word instead of His own feelings, “bursting bubbles”—the lies that Satan tried to ensnare Him with.

The Word of God provides us with the information needed to make it victoriously through adversity. Though I am not always full of faith, I am learning not to take destructive feelings too seriously. Our hearts cannot always be relied upon, but “God is greater than our heart, and knows all things” (1 John 3:20). Fortunately, He has let us in on the things we need to know! By His Word He has revealed to us the truth concerning who He is, who we are in Him, and what His heart is toward us. The preservation of God’s Word over the centuries bears witness to His desire for us to know what it says. It tells us of the importance of perspective (Proverbs 23:7): as a man “thinks within himself, so he is.” So the next time you feel unfixable, hopeless, or just plain nerdy, open up your Bible and take those feelings cum grano salis—with a grain of salt.